Hi Nima,
though I'm not Jeff, I will answer anyway ;)
- No you can't. Aolserver 3 and 4 work differently, just recompile them.
- So far I have always linked it up and not used package require, but Jeff and I clearly have different opinions on this. In general though it seems that package require is the way openacs is going to suggest the use of AOLserver
- Not as of now. Just make sure you include nsdb.so in your module section (ns_param nsdb ${bindir}/nsdb.so). And, depending on the way you install tdom, make sure this is included as well.
- Use the -b yourip:yourport when starting AOLserver. Though only required for priviledged ports, it is useful to remember this and use it all the time.